By Lana Mitchell

We in Milestone Two believe that happiness and freedom depend upon restoration of understanding and trust between man and his fellows.

How do you establish trust with another? How can understanding be reached by two individuals with different views?

The only way is to build on Affinity, Reality and Understanding, through Communication.

It seems too simple an answer — but a failure to communicate, an inhibition to communicate, or a non-confront to talk will never resolve the barriers, the charge and any upset that keeps people not understanding each other.

Let’s take an all too classic example of a teenager that engages in an activity that is seen to be wrong, out-ethics or against the law. Maybe getting caught under-age drinking, or found to be smoking pot regularly, or experimenting with hard drugs, or getting caught shop-lifting — and efforts to discipline or punish seem to have no impact.

How do you gain trust again in such circumstances?

It can only be with communicating with the teen about what problem they are encountering or experiencing that has them resorting to these poor ‘solutions’ in life.  And by working to gain a Reality, you can then re-establish an Affinity and gain an Understanding that will allow you to help them to solve the real  problem, thus resulting in better choices for them, and of course, better outcomes.

The same goes for estranged family members, at war over a deceased parent’s estate — or in a long running feud with a source that goes back so many years no one can really remember when or how it started.

How do you restore trust and gain understanding?

It can only be through communication with all persons involved. There needs to be confront to work over the issues and let all have their say — and a willingness to say how you feel, while also being able to listen to others and their views.

Understanding can never be reached if those involved are avoiding the situation, and do not use the vital tool of communication to unlock the puzzle that is causing upset or anguish.

And freedom and happiness can never be reached, unless understanding and trust are first achieved.

These are vital tools.

We of Milestone Two believe we must use them personally, and encourage others to do the same.

5 thoughts on “Freedom depends upon…

  1. Yes.
    And it should also be pointed out that at least 1/2 of communicating is listening…..and acknowledging with no invalidation of evaluation whatever is said.
    If one is going to ask a question or make a statement, one needs to be ready to hear the answer or reply and then simply acknowledge whatever is said so that the originator knows that they were heard and understood.
    A chaplain or mediator can simply remind and encourage people who are in an upset or dispute to do the above and keep communicating. If all parties persists this can resolve disputes and upsets that seem insurmountable.

  2. Getting this simplicity applied is the solution for sure and anyone who keeps things complicated and doesn’t apply this has another agenda and it doesn’t involve as-ising.

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