By Tom Martiniano
Arriving in the outside world from within the Scientology world is an interesting transition.
There is a destimulation that takes place, a key out that occurs, and a relief to be out of an escalating insanity.
But there are many things I miss.
First and foremost — the purpose and intention that I experienced there. I know I am not alone in my views that there is an void that seems to exist when it is gone.
I miss being surrounded by able, competent Scientologists.
I miss telling someone that I’m keyed out and having them understand what I mean.
I miss telling someone that they are theta. How do you describe that to someone else?
I miss the excitement of working as part of an industrious team, where there is passion and honest hard work to get something difficult achieved. Sometimes with the odds that had been thought to be impossible.
I miss saying that someone is Dev-Ting me. How do you translate that out here in the world?
I miss letting someone know that they are nattering, which registers to them that their harsh words are indicators that they have overts in the area they are nattering about – not just giving constructive or valid criticism.
I miss having real terminals that I can trust, rely on, and talk frankly to about matters that are dear and close to my heart.
I miss being around people who have done the Communications Course, and use and apply those basics to the result of great animated conversations.
I miss going to muster and hearing good news of what was achieved and what we are going to do next.
I miss saying I am ARCXen (now I have to be miffed or mad or angry).
I miss being able to say I was line charging. Belly laugh just does not seem to cover it, no matter how big your belly is.
I miss telling someone that the movie I saw made me exterior. Now I have to be “high” or something icky.
I miss the effort to have my stats up. Out here many seem to think it is better to be a victim with downstats and most don’t use statistics at all.
I miss being around people who are OK on being wrong, and don’t insist on being right every single time. Out here everyone is right, and they let you know it.
I miss all-hands renovations. Who needs help?
I miss getting a commendation from someone. Out here you get a phone call but you can’t file it in your ethics file. There is no record.
I miss calling roll to lots of enthusiastic students in the academy, each one working to be the best auditor they can be.
I miss having a withhold or two from my senior(s). Adds some real challenge to the day, no question.
But I don’t miss the current scene in the Church.
And I definitely don’t miss Miscavige or any of the crazy, twisted, upside-down world he has created.
I miss the actual Scientology world – before it was corrupted into something else quite sinister.