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By Ann E.

When I got into Scientology many years ago I had one major ruin that I wanted to handle.

After getting up the Bridge and through OT 7 it still wasn’t handled, but, I attested because I didn’t think it could get handled on Solo Nots.

That ruin was such a deep dark secret that I could barely admit it to myself let alone anyone else.

I first noticed the ruin when I was just a kid. It had to do with work and having a job. The ruin or key-in that occurred was a feeling of self degradation and one of thinking that almost anyone else could do a better job than I could, and that I was certain to do something horribly wrong. This awful feeling pervaded my life and made me feel like a failure.

With my very first job, a baby sitting job, I felt the key-in occur and for the rest of my life that key-in occurred with every job I ever had.

It caused me to blow from jobs, blow from production.

You can only imagine what it did to my production stats as well as making me feel miserable about myself and my life, because I really wanted to feel the joy of production at work.

I originated this ruin many times while I was on OT 7 and I was always told to just keep auditing and it would handle, but it didn’t.

After auditing outside the church I sought out help but never got the help I needed until I got some auditing with Ingrid Smith, a NOTs trained auditor in the Independent Field.

With the auditing I got with her I began to see what I was doing wrong with my solo auditing. She also helped me to figure how, with the tech, to very precisely narrow in on the exact charge and handle it terminatedly.

After that auditing, I began to solo audit again and this time really confronted and found the exact area of charge and as-is-ed that charge. I didn’t realize how much change had occurred until I noticed that the key-in regarding work that I was so accustomed to have occur just wasn’t happening anymore.

The day that I realized that was recently, and I must say was the happiest day of my life. I can now feel the joy of production and create as I wish in the area without feeling miserable and wanting to blow from the area.

This is an incredible dream come true and one that I had actually somewhat given up on having this lifetime. I realized that this new gift is far, far superior to winning any lottery. It is the gift of personal freedom and true happiness.

I feel so lucky and so grateful to LRH and the tech he gave us and to have help like Ingrid gave me.

I now know that anyone’s deep dark secrets, ones that they can barely admit to themselves, can be handled with the tech on Solo Nots. And yes, I will do all I can to help others experience the relief that I now experience and to have their dreams come true.

5 thoughts on “I feel so lucky

  1. Well done to both Auditor and Supervisor!

    I’ve been fortunate in the last couple of years to have worked with some very capable people. I’ve been studying, training, auditing, getting instructs and crams. It is very real to me that auditing results improve with a coordinated, and skilled, group activity.

    I’ve benefitted enormously from the oversight of a competent CS, and the insight of a competent cramming. Each being I work with in auditing, or in training, is unique, and it amazes me to this day how each being responds so positively to Standard Tech applied.

    This stuff is hands down, incredible, intense, live, and real. And worth every ounce of blood, sweat and tears shed to achieve what can be achieved.

    Thank you Ingrid 🙂

    • Thank you Jim! Ron gave us the most incredible tech and he gave us the OT levels. A very nasty SP has tried to suppress this tech and there are some more SPs out here in the field trying to do that too-it is interesting to note that those out here were doing it when they were in the Church too. I, for one, along with some others refuse to let this become the best kept secret in the Universe!!

      • To complement your post. Indeed there have been folks in possession of tech they had been hoarding to serve their own financial interests instead of helping others making available and delivering this valuable step/level. By middle of last year, all materials and tools needed to fully apply every facet of Audited NOTs/Solo NOTs had been acquired and compiled into course form.

  2. Marvelous to hear this Jim. And wonderful job you continue to do there too, Ingrid. We also need to remind ourselves, that it still those all important ‘success stories’, that inspire and motivate people to continue. Definitely no secrets required there! 🙂

  3. Thanks, Ann E. for sharing this personal story with us. It’s a very heart-warming story, and I can imagine the relief you felt upon resolving this issue.

    This kind of “discussion” is the kind of thing I expected when I first got into Scientology. I expected others to accept you as you are without ridicule, because we all have these “ruins” as well. And instead of being the perpetual victims of these things, we have the ability (because of the Tech) to overcome the most ingrained of personal problems. I’m glad we have a “forum” here among true friends to express these thoughts and share these wins.

    Special thanks to Ingrid Smith for again helping another being improve her survival. I’ve never physically met Ingrid, but we’ve talked on the phone and emailed back and forth. She’s a true gem.

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